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Intermission… giveaway time!

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UPDATE: Apologies to those who tried to comment earlier when I had comments disabled for this post. Seriously, derr Shauna!

Thank you for the kind comments on the shark posts. It’s been good to let it all out!

With all the melanoma wafflings, I nearly forgot to do my Summer Up & Running giveaway and the courses start in just over a week. So, do you fancy training for 5K or 10K glory with your own running coach? And a devoted cheerleader? (that would be me)

Our 5K Beginners Course starts on Monday 9 June and the 10K Course starts on Thursday 12 June, each going for eight weeks.

What’s it like to run with us? Have a gander at this rockin’ new video, in which some of our lovely graduates spill the beans about their U&R experience…

I’m giving away five free places, with the winner choosing the course they’d like to do. All you have to do is leave a comment on this blog post and tell me, which course would you like to do and why would you like to run?

  • Entries close 11PM GMT on Wednesday 3 June.
  • There will be five winners and they have their choice of 5K or 10K courses.
  • The winner can gift the prize to a friend, so you can enter if you want to surprise a friend.
  • Winners will be randomly selected.
  • Winners can be from anywhere in the world. Previous winners are eligible to enter again. Remember the Courses are for women only.
  • Sorry for the awkward transition of subject matter. I’ll wrap up the Wally saga soon!

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Sunday afternoon haulage

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Highland's Strongest Woman

I didn’t realise until Sunday that I have a burning ambition to drag a truck down a road with my bare hands.

I was at the inaugural Highland’s Strongest Woman contest, cheering on my kickass personal trainer Shona and her fellow ladies of steel.

Holy moly. First they did a medley of carrying heavy objects ranging from 40 to 100 kilos (88 – 220lb) over a 20 metre course. Then they had to do as many 100 kilo deadlifts as possible in 90 seconds. Then they had to press heavy weights (can’t remember how heavy) above their heads as many times as possible in 90 seconds.

All very impressive, but then they did the Truck Pull & Drag. There was a rope attached to a 3 tonne truck. They had to grab that rope and pull the truck along for 20 metres, then run around to the front of the truck, jump into a harness, then haul it back in the other direction, as seen in the photo above.

One could read the papers or walk the dog or go to the pub on a sunny Sunday afternoon or one could pull a truck along the road for fun. Watching those dames it seemed like a brilliant idea!

They finished with the car deadlift. I think it was a Renault Clio or similar, but dude, it was a car. The three women who successfully did it then had a lift-off, with 10 kilo weight being chucked into the back of the car until finally with 60 extra kilos there was a winner.

The whole event was so inspiring. The patience and determination over time needed to be able to lift like that. The guts to take part with 150 people looking on. The way the competitors cheered each other on. Gold!

And of course I loved how they looked badass with their stripey socks and chalk dust. If you met them on the street you may not know about their secret strong superpowers, until you asked them to open a jar or they casually lifted you over their heads. Totally want to be like them some day!

PS I typed this myself! Sorry voice dictation fans! I’ve been doing an hour or so per day. Next up, lifting mugs of tea. Then a short leap to small vehicles? Look out!

 

Spot the monster

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loch-ness

Here I am again with another terrible voice dictation. It’s been nearly four weeks and I’m finding that the straight in English Australian English! is working better now, because the more cranky I get delivered I get with it, the more Aussie my voice becomes.

last week I didn’t manage to post, Jeanette kindly gave me free pass from our writing pact. I was feeling very thanks D thanks D ANGSTY and I didn’t want to leave a miserable post sitting up there all week. I nearly flaked out again tonight but Gareth centimetres now said to me just now, “five dollars US is almost 3 British pounds, I can’t believe you’re giving up so easily”.

Gareth parents are currently in town and tonight we went to the doors in. Dublin. fuck. DORES INN for dinner. Also known as home of the giant scones. 10 months on from her accident, Mary is doing brilliantly and getting ever stronger. And thus I resolve to be likewise. Pow!

I took the above photo at 9:08 PM. I know it looks kind of obnoxious when people put hashtag no filter on insta grand photos, but I just wanted to say that this one doesn’t have any filter because I’m really blown away by how beautiful lochness was, or nutshell. AU NATUREL.

Eleven. Eleven!

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Apple voice dictation

I think I have this voice recognition thing figured out now. I hadn’t noticed that you can change the language settings!

I had it on American English, which made me sound like a drunken lunatic. But thanks to Tamakikat‘s sage comment I discovered that you can download other languages. First I changed it to A stray Liam Australian English which worked a little better, but British English seems to be the most accurate.

For me anyway. It doesn’t like Gareth very much! We both read out this random paragraph from the guardian as an experiment:

Peter Moores has been given a second opportunity to coach England after his appointment was confirmed this morning. The 51-year-old Lancashire coach previously held the job between 2007 and 2009 but was dismissed after disappointing on-field results and a damaging personality clash with then captain Kevin Pietersen, who was also deposed.

My attempt:

Peter Moores has been given a second opportunity to coach England Archie’s appointment was confirmed this morning. The 51-year-old Lancashire coach previously held the job between 2000 and 70,009 that was dismissed after disciplining on film results and damaging personality clash within Capt Kevin Peterson who was also the post.

Disciplining on film! Ooh er.

Gareth’s attempt:

Universe has begun a second opportunity to put a wind that is appointment is confirmed this morning and 51 year old Lancashire Court juicy has adopted 2000 70,009 was dismissed after disappointing onto themselves and damaging personality clash with them Two Kevin Peterson result of the post.

I reckon Apple needs to fly a variety of Scots over to California and get working on this. You may recall that Siri cannae handle the accent either.

I kinda liked the surreal randomness of the American English dictations, maybe I’ll switch it back!

Diane, it’s 3pm

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This post is brought to you by Apple’s voice to text dictation thingy.

I had some surgery last week which I’ll write about soon. My left arm is out of action for a couple of weeks. I’m determined not to fail on my writing bet with Jimmy. No not Jimmy I said Jeanette. JENNETTE. But I’m rubbish at typing with one hand. So here I am yapping at the computer feeling like a twit.

It’s weird speaking out loud like this. I always thought I wrote microscope. No not microscope. Wrote like I spoke. It turns out my brain is better connected to my fingertips than it is to my mouth. I’m not feeling very articulate in this format! How did people dictate murders in the old days without feeling like like an idiot? Letters, not murders! I don’t think the computer likes my accent.

My sister is visiting for a few days. Later on she’s going to help me wash my hair which is totally hottie no grotty after a week of neglect. Das Gareth said he was unqualified in the field of hair washing. But he has been making great cups of tea. I’m bloody lucky and thankful for all the groovy people in my life and return the favour as soon as I can.

Net flicks update! I have been watching out of parts. No. House of cards. It’s a come down after Friday night lights, and there is nothing about any of the characters I can remotely warm to, but Kevin Stacey Stacey Stacey SPACEY and Robin Wright – ok how come it understands Robin Wright but not given Stacey, no Kevin Spacey? oh now you’ve got it – are such great actors and so beautiful to look at, that I’m hooked.

It’s taken me half an hour to write this dribble dribble dribble DR I VEL so I will spare you any further disjointed renting renting renting RANTING. Have a good week, good people!

Great Underwhelming Statues of the World

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They are iconic. They grace postcards and tea towels. They inspire poetry and plastic replicas. But in reality they’re just a little bit shithouse. When you get up close in person you can’t help thinking, “Is that it?”

Here are the Great Underwhelming Statues of the World I’ve been lucky enough to see…

Greyfriars Bobby, Edinburgh
You know the story – John Gray dies and his faithful hound Bobby keeps vigil over his grave for fourteen years. When the hound died he was immortalised by this statue. He was only a wee dog and the statue is to scale so… hmmm.

Bobby & Mothership, 2004

Bobby & Mothership, 2004

The Little Mermaid, Copenhagen
Anti-climax ahoy!

Little Mermaid

Ripped arf!

Manneken Pis, Brussels
I saw the Manneken Pis souvenirs before I saw the statue itself. Creepy chocolate ones, chess pieces; gigantic garden-gnomish replicas. I thought we were in for a mega statue with blush-worthy equipment. But we almost walked straight past it!

Manneken Pis

Where? Wha?

The Dog On The Tuckerbox, Gundagai, Australia.
Driving from Central West New South Wales to Melbourne takes about eight hours, which is equivalent to 125 hours if you’re under ten years old. The only thing that could hush the chorus of are we there yet are we there yet from the back seat was the promise of stopping at Gundagai to see the famed hound atop the lunchbox.

Such a thrill for a child after five hours cramped up with siblings and suitcases, to finally stop to eat a wilted Vegemite sandwich and gaze upon this masterpiece!

Pic from sydney-australia.biz

Pic from sydney-australia.biz

Do you have any must-see anti-climatic statues, folks? Would love to add more to the list.