weight loss tips

Phoning it in

April 12, 2015 by

Ducks of Inverness

I remember Jillian Michaels screaming Don’t phone it in! during in her 30 Day Shred DVD, probably as I slumped on the couch pouring water over my head. I haven’t done that DVD in yonks but that phrase stayed with me. Don’t phone it in. Don’t half arse it.

Yet here I am at 11.30pm with my Blogging Pact deadline closing in, the Conservative Party oh so close to collecting £5 from me. I have no excuse, just bloody disorganised. Can I blame The Mothership’s impending arrival? Not really. She is low maintenance these days and no longer says things like, “When was the last time you cleaned underneath the oven?”.

Anyway, I have an action plan for next week. I’m putting down the phone.

By the way, does anyone watch The Americans? I don’t know anyone else who watches it so I’m dying to talk about it. It’s the 1980s, Matthew Rhys and Keri Russell are KGB agents undercover in the US. There’s gazillions of terrible wigs and Keri Russell is so badass that Felicity is forever banished from my mind.

Here is Neighbour Cat. Her latest thing is dropping by to Sleep On A Bag. A wheelie suitcase, my handbag, my gym bag, and here upon a pile of grocery bags. She just curls up then shall not be moved for three hours.

Up & Running March 5K winners

February 27, 2015 by

Thanks for all your four-legged giveaway comments!

If you missed out but would like to join our only live 5K Course for 2015, you can use the code MARCH2015 at checkout for 20% off until the course starts on Monday 9 March.

This discount can also be used on our other self-paced courses – 10K, Half Marathon and the Up & Moving walking course.

Here are the lucky winners as decided by the Random Number Generator:

Cazz – who loves mysterious wild wolves
Desiree – adores an elephant
Clementine – is an alpaca fan
Meg J – is on Team Cat
Nicole – loves orcas and also Brutus, her Dogue de Bordeaux.
Eloise – is also on Team Cat but is a recent convert to Team Monkey!

I’ve emailed you with the details so please get in touch ASAP to claim your prize. Thanks again for taking part, folks!

Win a spot on the March Up & Running 5k course

February 19, 2015 by

Giveaway time! This is the first and only time I’ll don the Up & Running 5K Course pimp hat this year. The March 5K is the one live course we’re running in 2015*, as we need to clear space for the epic task of creating a new Marathon course.

The course starts on Monday 9 March and goes for eight weeks. Here’s what you get…

an eight week training plan to get you 5k race ready, designed to gradually increase your strength and fitness while avoiding injury
a daily blog chock full of support materials, like running techniques, drills, videos and inspiring videos
unlimited support from expert coach Julia Jones, for all your running questions
access to our private community forum so you can cheer/moan every step in a safe, friendly environment.

I’m giving away five free places. All you have to do is leave a comment on this blog post and answer the following question:

What is your favourite four-legged creature and why?

(I got this question by googling “best random questions”. Hehe.)

Entries close 11PM GMT on Wednesday 25 February.
There will be five winners and each win a place on the Spring 5K Course.
The winner can gift the prize to a friend if desired.
Winners will be randomly selected.
Winners can be from anywhere in the world. Previous winners are eligible to enter again. Remember the course is for women only.
* self-paced versions of all courses still available!

2014 Review Thingo

February 7, 2015 by

I’ve got no bloody idea where January went. I wish I could say it was glamorous book promotion or naked skydiving, but it was mostly stomping around in the snow trying to hit my 10,000 steps per day. A very belated happy new year to you all!

Here’s my untimely annual review. Previous episodes: 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010 and 2009.

1. What did you do this year that you’d never done before?

visited the most northerly public toilet in mainland Great Britain.
got my eyebrows tinted. After a lifetime of invisible eyebrows and furious pencilling, you can’t imagine the delights of 24/7 definition! Until they faded, then my eyeballs got sorta lost in my face again. Anyone else have this problem?
my forearm said goodbye to Wally the skin cancer
finally went full time freelance as a writer/web marketing-y type of person (rubbishness at describing skill set no doubt contributed to taking so long to take the plunge).
deadlifted 85 kilos (had set a goal of 100kg for 2014, but had to take five months off deadlifts after Wally!).

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for this year?
I had a word of the year – consistency. It guided me sweetly through the first half of the year but the second half I quite lost it. I didn’t feel drawn to choosing a word this year; I’m kinda guiding actions and decisions based on how I want to feel. It’s not as woo-woo as it sounds! One month in, it’s working well.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes! Including my best mate Jenny on December 23. She said I could be an honorary Auntie so I plan to dote from afar!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Auntie Marg passed away, one of our beloved quartet of Great Aunts. Still can’t believe her twinkly smile is no longer with us.

5. What countries did you visit?
Spain, France (for a day) and Italy.

6. What would you like to have next year that you lacked in this one?
I don’t feel I lacked for anything, except maybe for bargain cast iron pots. Sainsbury’s makes these great Le Creuset-esque pots and they were on sale last January. I had a bunch of Nectar points saved up, so I ordered two huge casserole pots and a griddle pan for all of £40. Then I found out about the melanoma and in a fit of morbid madness I returned the pots.

My reasoning was that since I didn’t actually need the pots, keeping them would be tempting fate, like I was arrogantly assuming I’d be around to use them. What use would Gareth have for a pile of cast iron pots if I died? Would he bury them with me, so I could make tasty slow-cooked casseroles with cheaper cuts of meat in the afterlife?

There was nothing logical at all about my thought processes during that period. And now that I’m currently alive and hankering for a hearty stew I really regret returning those bloody pots.

7. What dates from this year will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

23 May – Melanoma all clear!
24 May – After seven fruitless visits, finally spotted dolphins at renowned dolphin-spotting place Chanonry Point. There were twenty dolphins leaping around very close to shore, with the sun setting in the background. Pure magic! Especially since we went for chips afterwards.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Watching all ten seasons of Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix in an alarmingly short period of time.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Watching all ten seasons of Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix in an alarmingly short period of time.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Aside from Wally, a couple of colds but otherwise dandy!

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Vichy Aqualia serum for dehydrated skin- a Sali Hughes recommendation. Lizard face, sorted!

12. Where did most of your money go?
Groceries? I laid low with the spending this year.

13. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The visiting Neighbour Cat!

She’s actually teeny tiny under all that fur!

14. What song will always remind you of this year?
The Gambler by Kenny Rogers. Know when to hold ‘em; know when to fold ‘em. Great advice, K-Dawg.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Happier.

b) thinner or fatter?
Same.

c) richer or poorer?
Slightly poorer but no worries.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Daily stepping.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Denial of reality through the medium of Netflix binges.
(Have now cancelled the Netflix subscription for my own good!)

18. How did you spend Christmas?
In London with Gareth and Rhiannon. Rum punch FTW!

19. Did you fall in love this year?
Definitely that Neighbour Cat.

20. What was your favourite TV program?
I finally watched Breaking Bad and loved it, and The Good Wife was a surprise favourite. But can’t go past Friday Night Lights for pure love and obsession!

21. What was the best book you read?
The Signature of All Things.

22. What was your favourite film of this year?
The Possibilities Are Endless.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 37 and had a low-key day with a walk then lunch at the Dores Inn.

24. What kept you sane?
Bloody brilliant friends! Would not have got through it without you, THANK YOU!

25. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
A toss up between Jesse Pinkman and a Coach Taylor, Tim Riggins, Matt Saracen combo. I’m sure they have real names!

26. Who did you miss?
The Mothership.

27. Who was the best new person you met?
Does Neighbour Cat count as person? I love that grumpy nutter!

Enjoy the process

January 10, 2015 by Blog Editor

It’s Publication Day for our Up & Running book! Why a pic of Julia Jones in a tub? Well, when Dietgirl came out I didn’t properly enjoy P-Day. I felt scared, fraudulent and undeserving. Back then I still believed if I dared celebrate something I’d be immediately struck down for being so indulgent (see also: iPhone laundering incident).

But now I appreciate that life is random and you can’t dress rehearse disaster (paraphrasing Brené Brown), so you have to soak up these moments!

I went a bit bonkers during the writing part of Dietgirl, too. I had a meltdown over the last chapter, one which Gareth never tires of re-enacting. I somehow wound up kneeling on the floor, punching the seat of my chair while howling, “I CAN’T DOOOO THIIIIIS!”.

This time I declared I would enjoy the process. Every time Gareth looked in while Julia and I were writing he’d ask, “Are you punching the chair yet?” and I’d be all, “Nooooo… still good!” and he’d look disappointed.

I think it comes from knowing you’ve done it before and that it’s meant to be hard, but also from not having your entire self-worth tied up in the project. This time I just loved the act of creation and collaborating, even the months when I had to use that bloody voice dictation software.

So Julia lounging up there in the bathtub (snapped during the book’s photo shoot) sums up a fun and relaaaaaxed process and for once in my life I reckon I’ve been fully present for it all. A large gin shall be quaffed tonight. Woohoo!

If you’d like to know more about the book, here’s the lowdown. I wanted to say mega thanks to my friends and family and blog pals for being so patient during those writing months, to the Up & Running community for your fantastic contributions and for always inspiring us, to the good folks at CICO Books, and of course to Julia for everything!

Farewell to the Brown House

December 25, 2014 by Blog Editor

Last Friday we handed the keys of the Brown House to its new owners. After very smelly beginnings we loved that place in all its 1970s glory. But much has changed since 2009 so it was time to pass the brown baton. Apparently the new owners plan to do all the Someday things – replace the aged kitchen, bathroom, stairs… and put in an en-suite! Looks like they have no need for a bedroom beer cellar.

We paid a visit to finalise things and camped out in the living room for old times’ sake. We narrowed down our favourite Brown House memories. Mine: the time Gareth was putting up curtains and the curtain rod slipped from his grasp and donked him right on the head. He was so infuriated that he chucked the screwdriver across the room where it donked the light switch plate, smashing it in half and giving him twice as many DIY jobs to complete.

His happiest memory was the time I got up early one morning to go down to the loo. I somehow slipped and went down the stairs on my arse with a cartoony CLONK CLONK CLONK CLONK CLONK BANG.

Rhiannon was staying over at the time and both she and Gareth rushed out of their rooms to find me in a crumpled heap on the floor. After quickly establishing I was fine, they howled and howled with laughter as the sound + crumpled heap combo was apparently all too much. To this day Gareth only has to say, “Remember Shauna… the stairs?” and Rhi instantly splutters, “Those clonks! That crumpled pile of Shauna!” as tears of mirth stream down her face.

Maybe your fondest family memories aren’t based on the misfortunes of others, but slapstick is timeless for us!

Anyway. To mark this life transition I wanted to gather some less painful memories…

This Artex. If you stared at the ceiling long enough… self-hypnosis.

The time that Gareth found a typewriter at the tip and spent months restoring it so we could type stupid notes.

The time the little girls next door gave me this classy manicure. They’d set up a beauty parlour on the street and it only set me back 20p.

Also, this lush green crop in the field behind the house that made a satisfying swishy sound in the wind.

The moment each year when the bluebells arrived in the woods up the road.

Our gardening efforts were patchy… we never could top the huge ass parsnips of 2010!

Strawberry wine experiment + always reliable pea shoots.

After the initial de-stinkification efforts we never got around to much decorating, aside from painting the dining room BLUE, as Gareth explains here in an attempted Aussie accent.

That time he photobombed the tiny Christmas tree.